My Testimony

I thought I was happy with life as it was before I became a Christian, but in hindsight I love life so much more now, and I have a true sense of purpose.

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I'm guessing that other Christians reading this already have a smile on their face, as they probably experienced a similar story themselves.  However, I can also relate to non-Christians being very skeptical and thinking I'm crazy.

 

My hope is that non-believers reading will consider learning more about Christianity themselves, researching evidence, weighing up the facts, and finding the truth. 

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Before 1998 I was undecided as to whether God existed and only attended church for weddings and baptisms, which sadly is pretty normal, especially growing up in England.  I rested firmly in the belief that I was a "good person", and felt that "if" there was a God, this would be good enough.  I thought of religion as an emotional crutch and thought that Christians were mostly judgy hypocrites.

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As time rolled on, it was as if there was a voice inside, urging me to find out more.  On several occasions we invited missionaries from different religions in to our home, to learn more.  Each time I felt that I was getting closer to an answer, but ended up feeling that something was missing.

It was then that I found out about the 'Alpha Course' from a Minister of a hospital chapel in Oxford, where our youngest son Christopher was born.  Alpha is an informal (and rather entertaining) ten-week course, that originated in London.  It presents the core beliefs of Christianity around which all denominations can unite.  It is run in small groups, so that you don't feel too intimidated to air your opinions and ask questions.  In Alpha you can be silent and just listen, or you can be very vocal and objective and no-one seems to mind.

To my delight, I discovered that the church closest to our home was participating in Alpha, so that Sunday I went with my eldest son Matthew to the worship service in order to find out more.  For no reason that I could possibly understand at the time, I was really excited in going.

As we entered the church I was hit by an amazing feeling of warmth and excitement.  The church itself (Saint John's, Haydon Wick, Swindon, Wiltshire, England) is Evangelical and the service we attended was much more modern in style than I expected.  There was a band playing, flags were waving and people were clapping along.  I remember running back home afterwards to tell everyone how much I had enjoyed it and what I had learned.  No-one could believe that this was the same person that had loathed the thought of church for all these years.

We discussed Alpha with the Reverend of the church (Raymond Adams) and decided to host it at our house. We learned so much from the course and it brought us to faith.  I realized that life as a Christian was what I wanted more than anything.  I'd finally managed to figure out what was missing from my life.

However, a few weeks into the course, we learned that the company I worked for (Galileo International) was to close it's UK office and I was offered a position at the headquarters in Denver.  It was a huge decision, especially since I normally resist big changes in life, but this time it was different.  For some inexplicable reason this just felt so right.  I had no doubts in my mind that this was the best thing to do.

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Since I came to faith in England, I decided to confirm it there too, before leaving for America.  I remember the day so well.  I expected to have a huge feeling of "warm and fuzziness" as we went in through the church doors, that Easter weekend... but nothing happened.  The service began, with candles and the choir singing worship... but nothing happened.  Then, those of us in the congregation that were being confirmed that day read from our scripts, proclaiming our vows...  still nothing.  At this point I was wondering if I was misleading myself.  I felt empty inside.  I approached the altar and knelt down in front of the Bishop.  He gently placed his hands on my head.  All of a sudden I was so full of spirit that I started shaking, and tears flowed down my cheeks.  I felt like a thousand degrees.  My head was in a spin.  I felt happier than ever before.  It was as if Jesus Himself was touching me.  I KNEW THIS WAS THE TRUTH!

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Skipping ahead a few months.  No sooner had we settled into our new home, we discovered Eastern Hills Community Church (www.EHills.org) and became involved in several small groups.

But here's the part that I find rather extraordinary.  When I met the Pastor (Shawn Sikkema), I told him how much Alpha had done for me and asked if it was something he had considered taking part in.  I told him that I felt that this was one of the main reasons I'd come to America, to help spread the course here.  By incredible coincidence, he introduced us to another family (the Tiepelows) that had moved here from England only a few weeks before us, who also thought that Alpha was why they had been lead to America!

From that point we ended up running several successful Alpha courses at Eastern Hills, and my hope is that it led many to a closer relationship with Jesus.

Sadly, this story is not all good news though.  Soon after moving to the States, we discovered that my Dad in England was terminally ill with Cancer and given only six weeks to live.

Being so far away during this time was dreadful.  All I was able to do was pray for him each night.  The prayers clearly helped, as he lived for a further ten months, with a fairly good quality of life during this time.  Whilst his death was devastating for all the family, my faith made it so much easier for me, knowing that he had in fact passed on to a far better place.

Something that David, the Pastor of my Dad's church told me, also brought me comfort.  He said that before passing away, my Dad told him how much it meant to him, that his children were strong in faith.  I'm sure this gave him additional strength during such a difficult time.

How much I value the moments I spent with praying with Dad at the altar of the hospital chapel, giving us both the ability to carry on with peace and hope in our hearts and minds.  "It is well with my soul" as the hymn says.

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Over the course of the next few short years my Mum passed away and I went through a divorce.  My life was turning upside down.  In hindsight I look back on that time and realize that God's timing is perfect.  He knew all that I had coming my way and knew that I would need His love and comfort to see me through to better times.  And better times they are indeed, very happily married to Heather, and watching our kids (and now grandchild) grow.  God is good.

I hope you've enjoyed reading my personal story and that perhaps it's touched your heart.  If you are not a Christian and, like me a few years ago, have questions, please reach out to me and I'll do my best to help in any way that I can.  Or maybe you can find an Alpha course near you.

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God bless you all.
Graham